Freedom in Obedience

The longer I'm here, the more humbled I become. I'm humbled by the people who choose to share their stories with me. I'm humbled by the joy I see on children's faces regardless of their circumstances. I'm humbled by women like Rossy who have dedicated their lives to serving kids--who take pleasure in dancing to kids' worship songs and having marker-covered hands from craft time. I'm humbled by fellow staff members who have invited me into their families, fed me countless meals, and made me feel like I'm never alone here.

But more than the people who have surprised and taught me, God has amazed me. He is the one and only true redeemer. He can reconcile relationships where all hope is lost. He can heal the weak, lost, and impoverished. He gives love, purpose, and strength. While I cannot do any of those things, he has blessed me with the opportunity to watch and take part in this work with him. He has shared his presence with me and promises to never take it away and that is the most beautiful thing I've ever heard.

Through it all, he's teaching me obedience--when I don't have the skills or means or understanding or confidence or language ability. He's teaching me to do now what needs to be done, rather than putting it on my to do list for tomorrow; to ask questions and give encouragement and ask forgiveness in the moment rather than staying quiet. He's teaching me to give all that I have to where I'm at and the people I'm with, and he's showing me time and again how he provides.

I was asked to teach a Bible lesson and lead a craft for about 35 kids in Spanish today. Now I'm usually more of a small group co-leader than a big group teacher type so this didn't exactly fit into my personality description, not to mention language barrier apprehensions. So when I was asked, I thought "there are two options: say yes and get nervous because I can't do this or say yes with confidence that this is God's ministry which means that he's going to use it for good." Rationalization led me to obedience in my approach to teaching, not just my actions--something I am very much just beginning to learn.

Will I be the next big children's speaker? Not a chance. Does it matter? No. I did my best to serve God and the kids, and it was a blessing to be a part of it (although I do admit that a nap sounds really good right about now!) While obedience definitely isn't all rainbows and sunshine, I think I've found greater freedom to grow and find joy through obedience than I've ever found following after my own desires. It's kinda like my little cousin once told me "God is the super coolest!" :)

My Own Amazing Race

I packed my bags, drove to the airport, said a tearful goodbye to my family at the gate (which a fellow travelor told me was better than reality tv), and made it to my terminal with time to spare. It was all going according to plan, and I thought I was going to be the last flight out before the brunt of the winter storm came through and shut everything down. Then the delays started. Four hours later, they cancelled the flight, and I found myself sitting in the airport, phoneless, wondering what I was going to do until my rescheduled flight the next morning at 7am.

Thankfully, I had spent the last few hours getting to know some of the people sitting in the terminal around me. I was delighted to hear their stories and found us being fast (although temporary) friends. One of my new friends was named Steven. He is a Navy Seal in Norfolk and was kind enough to let me use his phone many times. After our flights had been rescheduled, we made our way to baggage claim together, had dinner at McDonalds (the only place still open), and began to work through what we were going to do about our stranded situation. After finding out that our flights had been postponed yet another day, I was determined to find a way to spend the next 40 hours somewhere besides the Indianapolis Airport.

I tried contacting shuttles, taxis, hotels, friends--everything was shut down, and the roads were horrible. I was about to give up when I remembered some Lighthouse teams were on their way down to stay at a hotel near the airport that night before their flight the next morning. In a last ditch effort, I called my sister who was able to connect me with the driver of the bus. In less than an hour my new friend Steven and I were on the road making our way back home. We dropped him off in Anderson, and I made it back to Upland after a 4 hour long bus trip that would normally have taken about an hour and a half.

I am SO thankful that this all worked out! Even through the snow when there seems to be so few options, God is there, and he provides :) While I wish I could already be in Mexico working with Back2Back Ministries, I know that I'll arrive in God's timing and am thankful that everyone who was going to be on that flight yesterday is safe. It's all a part of the adventure :)

The Journey Begins...

In less than one week, I will be in Mexico. It seems hard to believe that in a few short days I'll be living thousands of miles away from family and friends who I won't see face to face for months. As I try to wrap my mind around this idea, I'm also reminded of the ever-present question that's been running through my mind for the past few weeks: what does it mean to prepare for a year in Mexico?

Physically, I suppose it means getting immunizations, clothes, a visa, and other necessities. But what does it mean emotionally? socially? spiritually? Lately, I've felt a bit like a swinging pendulum--vascillating between intentionally journaling and talking with others about future expectations, fears, hopes, and prayers and focusing on being present where I'm at and who I'm with because I have no idea how to prepare for such a trip so maybe it's best to let what happens happen and to work through things as they come up. In reality, I think it would be best to find some sort of compromise between these to polarities but must admit that, try as I might, I'm not sure if I've been able to achieve this.

I'm so very excited to begin work with Back2Back. I can't help but smile at the thought of meeting the kids I'll be serving, getting to be a part of Back2Back's staff team, and meeting God in new ways through this adventure. I'm confident that I will be delighted often, grow immensely, and have an incredible experience. While newness and change always come with anxiety, it's comforting to know that I'm not alone. I'm surrounded by caring staff, praying and supportive friends and family in the States, and protected by God himself. I don't doubt that hard moments and days will come, but I know that these will not be in vain. They will be used for a beautiful purpose that I may not understand but can be confident exists.

So here we go! Off to an unknown journey that promises to be all sorts of an adventure! :)

Blessed & Thankful

This past year has been filled with parties and celebrations. new opportunities and goodbyes. changes and constants. old friends and new ones.

It’s been a lot of a lot of things, and I’m so very thankful for all that it has been. I’m thankful for God’s presence through it all—for him holding my hand and giving me opportunities to grow and helping me when I’ve needed it. I’m thankful for the last year I was able to spend with good friends at Taylor. I’m thankful for all of the time and effort professors poured into me and the skills and knowledge they provided me with. I’m thankful for one professor in particular who knew me well enough to encourage me to look into an opportunity with Back2Back Ministries. I’m thankful for Back2Back staff who have supported me. And I’m thankful for all of you! For friends and family who have invested in me and asked me about how I’m doing and decided to partner with me as I begin serving orphans in Quintana Roo with Back2Back staff in January—for everyone who has prayed for me, talked with me, and helped me reach 96% funding for this adventure.

I hope that the Thanksgiving and Christmas seasons lead you to reflect on your blessings and that these thoughts give you encouragement and joy. Thank you. Happy Thanksgiving!

Dearest Partners :)

When I first realized that I would be partnering with others to raise financial support to serve with Back2Back for a year I, quite frankly, felt a bit intimidated and lost. As I have pursued this process over these past few months, I have come to realize the importance of this partnership. It is incredibly encouraging to talk about what God is doing in the lives of orphans, families, and widows in Quintana Roo, to see the connection this ministry has with so many friends and family members in the United States, and to get to play a part in the team God is bringing together to continue serving these kids and families. Prayer partners, financial supporters, short-term mission trip goers, friends, and advocates are all needed to do this work. I am so thankful for all of you who have committed to be a part of this work and am excited for us to continue this journey together. Each of you is so incredibly important!

It is so encouraging to know that I will not be embarking on this ministry alone but will be surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses and supporters. I hope that I can play a part and be an encouragement in each of your lives, as well. Please keep me updated on how you are all doing and how I can be praying for you, especially starting in January when I head off to Quintana Roo.

Thanks for all of your prayers and support so far! I'm excited to tell you that our team has something very exciting to celebrate--as of late last week 50% of the funding needed for me to begin my work as a Back2Back staff member has been committed! Yay! Thank you, Jesus!

Being a strong believer in rejoicing, five of us headed to Ivanhoes, and my Dad and I split the 50th Sundae (the Wildcat Two) 50-50 to wholeheartedly celebrate this provision. :)

It's been great to share this journey with all of you so far, and I would love to share more with you if you're interested! Just give me a call (765.667.1365) or send me an email (snace@back2back.org). I hope that you are overwhelmingly delighted today like I was on the night of our Ivanhoes celebration. Thanks! Love you!

God is Great

Ever since I realized that I had a say in what I got to be when I grew up, I’ve been afraid of greatness. Motivational speakers would come and talk about being world changers who made an “exponential impact”. People around me would cheer and talk about the big things they wanted to do; meanwhile I was completely terrified. I’ve always loved the idea of leading a quiet life and changing the world in small ways by the way I live on a daily basis. While one of my deepest desires is to have a purpose in life, I also feel overwhelmed by the thought that everything I do matters intensely. I've often been intimidated by the idea that I was created for greatness.

It wasn’t until this past weekend that I realized that I was looking at greatness from such a skewed perspective. Greatness isn’t about me or what I do, and it’s also not something I have to live up to. Greatness is about God. It’s about deciding to live in constant surrender, choosing to participate in the plan God’s created and recognizing that living life in pursuit of his presence is greatness—not anything I can plan or do. Is that scary and humbling? Yes, but it’s also beautiful, surprising, and unpredictable. Right now, I’m participating in greatness by working at the key control office at Taylor University. In three months, I will get to participate in greatness by working with kids and families with Back2Back in Mexico. Both are equally as worthy, equally as great, and have their own joys and trials.

I got to experience my first taste of God’s presence in Mexico this past weekend when I had the opportunity to visit the Back2Back site in Quintana Roo. I was able to meet many of the ministry partners I’ll be working with, spend time with some of the children and families we serve, and spend time with the site directors Erick and Julie Mowery. It was an incredible trip that helped to affirm that this is where I have been called to serve for at least the next little while.

I was amazed at the level of need and the unique, grace-filled ways that God is working through Back2Back to help meet those needs and pursue his sons and daughters living in Mexico. The site in Quintana Roo focuses specifically on preventing struggles experienced by orphans by working with families and children who are at risk of becoming orphans. More specifically, God is using Back2Back to help widows provide for their families and to reach out to children who are involved in local community centers. They are also involved in serving children who are already living in children’s homes.

The people I met in Mexico were absolutely beautiful, and I feel so blessed to serve them starting in January. Please pray for wisdom for both me and the Mowerys on where I can best use my abilities and experiences to serve with Back2Back. Please also pray for current and incoming Back2Back staff at the site in Quintana Roo, for God’s direction when making decisions on how to best work with children and families, and for the development of a new community center in a region called “Tres Reyes”.

Thanks so much for all of your support and prayers so far! I pray that partnering with me in this ministry will help you to grow, learn, and be encouraged, as well.  Love you guys!

33% Funded!!!

We're a third of the way there! God is so good, and I feel very blessed to have been a part of the encouraging process of partnering with you all! As of today, I am officially 33% funded :) Thank you all so very much for joining with me in this ministry! A good friend once told me there is no better way to celebrate than blowing bubbles so I decided to take her advice and celebrate the small things (ok... this is a pretty big deal so really, we're celebrating the big things!). Please continue to pray for me and for potential partners as I'm still about $16,000 away from being fully funded. And if you have any suggestions on how to celebrate 50% please do let me know :)